I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize