id be glad to
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
