Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
