We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
Randomize
