When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Randomize
