# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
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