How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
