...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
