i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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