At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
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