did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Randomize
