My hair reeks of homosexuality.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Randomize