she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize