were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
