No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Randomize