i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
