Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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