I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
