your room smells of hookers.
And success
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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