no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
