ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Randomize
