But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
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