good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Randomize
