I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
My feet surprised me
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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