Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
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