Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I'm too high and old for this...
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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