Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
