i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
