He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Randomize