We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
