my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
