its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
