If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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