Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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