I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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