i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize
