My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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