I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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