i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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