thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Randomize
