Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Holy sore nipples Batman
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Randomize
