Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I don't think brook has ever known best
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
