dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I think I am morally bankrupt
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
