One girl and one boy is just not enough.
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
