a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
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