yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
