so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize