Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
nutella sex= disaster
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize