I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Randomize
