rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
