: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
